THE FIVE MOST PATRIOTIC GI JOE CARTOONS

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THE FIVE MOST PATRIOTIC GI JOE CARTOONS
(JUST TWO DAYS LATE FOR THE FOURTH OF JULY)


 

EPISODE TITLE:  “Rocket’s Red Glare”

Reasons: Duh, the title. The story centers on middle class (minority) Americans trying to run a small business. The Joes help them. Oh, and it has people eating hamburgers. How American is that?

Bonus Reason: Roadblock ends the episode with an impromptu freestyle … wait for it.

 


 

EPISODE TITLE: “GI Joe: The Movie”

Reasons: The opening sequence; easily the most patriotic 3 and a half minutes ever drawn.

 


 

EPISODE TITLE: The Revenge of Cobra: The Vines of Evil”

Reasons: The Joes protect Washington, DC and all its monuments from giant balls of hail. With energy mirrors. Created by a black doctor. Who graduated from Harvard. Try and top that for patriotism.

 


 

EPISODE TITLE: “The Great Alaskan Land Rush”

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Reasons: Begins with the Joes transporting the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence. The Joes fight/cooperate with Russia’s elite force, The Oktober Guard, to decide the fate of Alaska. Cold War era patriotism at its finest.

 

 

 

 


 

EPISODE TITLE: “Sink the Montana”

Reasons: General Hawk goes to the Philadelphia Naval Yards to attend the decommissioning of a WWII battleship. The Admiral defects to save his ship. The Joes save the day by setting sail on the Navy’s oldest ship: the USS Constitution.

 


Bonus DIC episode

EPISODE TITLE: “Kindergarten Commandos”

Reasons: Cobra attempts to undermine American society by rewriting US history. That’s right, pro-Cobra textbooks for kids. In the end, Cobra is defeated by a group of kids, Red Dawn-style. Sort of.

 

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